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Cut And Run

Chapter 5

3/11/2004

It was a small hotel room, and as far as the girls could tell, at least 4 guys stayed there, with lots of others just drifting in and out. There was a sink in the corner of the room, filled with ice, a jar of mayonnaise and lunch meats in plastic bags. There was a loaf of bread on the dresser. There were wine bottles everywhere. The guys wore only jeans; no tops, and had dirty bare feet. They were older than the girls, but not by much. Thier AM radio played current hits, and they were were busy getting drunk. But, getting drunk cost money and these guys were hard core alcoholics.

It absolutely blew her mind, when she saw first one guy, then another, and finally another, tie off their arms with surgical tubing, fill the rig they shared, with cheap-ass wine, and stick it into their veins, register their blood in the rig, and shoot them selves up with wine!! Jeez! They noticed her eyes just about popping out their sockets. They explained, "It cost less," to get drunk if they just put it straight into their veins rather than drinking it." Well, that would explain the cruddy, run-down, hotel room; the fact none of them had jobs, and the sadness around their eyes. Thier bodies and faces were young, but their eyes looked old, and you felt these young men were just worn out. They also were, some of the nicest guys the girls had met in the city, taking the girls under their wings for the day, with no expectations... That was about the length of any committments, they knew back then. A day or two... No one could afford, or handle, any more.

The girls had no where better to go that night, and if the cops had been to her job, they may just go by the commune too! So they stayed where they were, and partied. If anything, she trusted her instincts. She knew somehow, they were safe, where they were. She passed on the wine. She already knew, she could not handle alcohol all that well. But, Debbie was a drinker, so she got drunk. They spent the evening playing cards, laughing, poking fun at each other and having a good time. About midnight, the guys passed out, and the girls fell to sleep. They had made it through another night, without any harm to either of them. Well, no harm that you could see. She would however, remember the "wine geezers" for the rest of her life. She never saw anything like that, ever again. Once was enough.

In the morning, the girls got up, made themselves a couple of “sink meat” sandwiches, drank some cola they had brought with them the night before, washed their teeth with their fingers and hotel soap, and told their new “friends,” "Thanks, and goodbye." They never saw those guys again. But, they were thankful they had been gentlemen. No matter what else, they had been protective and polite to the girls. Sometimes it was like that. You could meet someone on the streets, they would take you home, and you were safe. They would open their homes and hearts to you and treat you like family. You were instantly friends, and it was all good. But it wasn’t always like that. Sometimes you struck out, and your luck ran out...

They headed back towards the commune, walking in the morning heat. She was talking to Debbie about her pay she got yesterday, how it had to last them, how the commune really expected her to kick in and to help buy things for everyone that was in need at the time. She had tried to read that book Craig gave her, "Manifesto of the Communist Party," by Karl Marx and Frederick Engels. But deep down inside, she was no socialist at heart! She had never worked, never had money, and had no concept of how to handle it, let alone helping to take care of others! She did not know how to handle this money issue. Loyalty was a stranger to her, so she did what she did a lot. She started her day, living in the moment and not thinking much further than that.

That day, there was a lot of “Orange Sandoz” LSD going around. A guy they knew, got them some. They dropped a double doss each. Then, Debbie took off with the guy! She did not see Debbie again for a very long time. She does not even really remember her much after that, because Debbie just kept going in and out of jail, and in and out of her life, after that. Debbie even managed to escape a couple of times from the old Ventura Jail that used to stand on Garden Street, in old, downtown Ventura. That did not surprise her much. The younger Debbie, was a real pistol of a girl! She did not really like hanging around much with Debbie anymore, 'cause she could not count on her to be there the next day, or be there for her as a friend. Only time she really recognized loyalty, was when she saw a lack of it, in regards to her self. Debbie would just take off and strand her. That was scary. She could handle being alone. She just did not like it much. Especially when she was hitching long-distance, or after sun down. She headed back to the commune, and her boyfriend. By the time the double dose hit her, she was at home. Thank God, Budda, Karma, that Great Universal Spirit (AKA Gus), or what ever! Safe again for another day.

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"There was a child went forth every day, and the first object he looked upon and recieved with wonder or pity or love or dread, that object he became... And that object became part of him for the day... or for many years or stretching cycles of years." Walt Whitman